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by Judith Proctor

tune: Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, think I'll go and eat worms. (sort of like Polly Wolly Doodle)

Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, just 'cause I've got horns,
I've lots of hide, and I'm shaggy on the side, and I wish I'd never been born,
Long horns, short horns, thick horns, thin horns, horns that are curly on the tip,
Just 'cause we animals look like cows, desn't have to mean we're thick.

Everyone dislikes us, we're bottom of the polls, never make alien of the week,
But we're so cute, I'm a beaut, come and give my horns a tweak!
I've a bit of Fresian on my mother's side, my father was a wookie in Star Wars,
If I look so mournful, all the time, don't you think that I've got cause?

I wanna be a hero, fly out into space, live my life anew,
But instead, I gotta make my bed, here on Bucol Two,
Scientists are thick, Justin is a drip, who'd be a genetic engineer?
Whoops, gotta flee, 'cause comin' after me, is Commissioner Sleer!

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